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+--- Thread: Why men are happier (/thread-4318.html)
Why men are happier - Ponch - 08-18-2006
Got this in an email-
Men Are Just Happier People-
What do you expect from such simple creatures? Your last name stays put.
The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate
is just another snack. You can be President. You can never be pregnant.
You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a
water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth.
The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station
restroom because this one is just too icky. You don't have to stop and
think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles
add character. Wedding dress~$5000. Tux rental~$100. People never stare at
your chest when you're talking to them. The occasional well-rendered belch
is practically expected. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
One mood all the time. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You
know stuff about tanks.
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own
jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If
someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend. Your
underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more than
enough. You almost never have strap problems in public. You are unable to
see wrinkles in your clothes.
Everything on your face stays its original color. The same hairstyle lasts
for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck. You
can play with toys all your life. Your belly usually hides your big hips.
One wallet and one pair of shoes one color for all seasons. You can wear
shorts no matter how your legs look. You can "do" your nails with a pocket
knife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache. You can
do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.